‘Just look at the waters! As if it’s the Padma River!’

 ‘F-fucker, have you ever seen Padma River? Can you even spell it?’

‘Why is Padma your father’s property? Just because he has a mud hut somewhere in Bangladesh, he thinks Bangladesh is his private property.’

‘Watch yourself! Just watch yourself! What do you mean by a mud house? I have a fridge, you know, a colour television, two floors—’

Pinching his nose with one hand, Siddhartha guffawed infuriatingly, splashes of which landed on Sunando. ‘Listen boss, even the horse will laugh hearing all this. Didn’t you say just a week ago that the opposition party started agitating because your village still doesn’t have electricity?’ 

Gulping, Sunando said, “Erm, you’re not understanding the matter fully. That was the next village. The entire problem started because electricity had reached our village but not in theirs—’

‘Don’t try and swindle us boss, the village that was in darkness just the last week, has a colour television this week, perhaps Madhuri Dixit will visit it next week, and the week after that—hey, no, stop, you fucker! Look at the state of my trousers!’

Standing in knee-deep water, Siddhartha was poised to spurt a string of expletives, when Indranil jumped to Sidhu, hugged him and planting a smacking kiss, said— ‘Sidhu, my boy! The laundryman at home will clean your trousers white but just spare a thought about today. Isn’t this the perfect day to relax? It has rained so much throughout the day. S.K.G won’t take a class, we have all the freedom in the world till nine at night. There are very few things in the world that can measure up to the pleasure of wading in knee-high water. Did you see the girl standing at the crossroads, isn’t she attractive? Arey, Sidhu, we won’t get such a day anytime soon.’ Saying this, Indranil leaped into the waters as if he were diving right in from a mountain, splashing water on to the faces of his two friends.  

‘Are you kidding me? If you jump this way just one more time, I will call your home from a roadside booth and inform them that S.K.G is not taking a class today.’

Pulling Sunando’s lips, Indranil said, ‘Just look at my honest Yudhisthir! And boss, if people at my home ask you about your whereabouts now, what will you tell them then?’ 

‘Did I once agree to stay out till nine?’

‘What do you mean? Listen Sona, if you don’t stay that long, Indra and I will simply lift you and dump you in that water.’

‘Listen, you won’t get this chance again. We won’t be able to play truants in S.K.G’s class. He has the eyes of a vulture and will definitely catch us. Today’s freedom is an anomaly. There’s no one to mind us. None will know at home, no one will disturb us, I have made sure of that.’

‘I don’t mind accompanying you. But this Indra here was screaming his plans in front of the department. Are you sure this hasn’t reached S.K.G’s ears yet? The place is swarming with his yes-men.’

‘Look at yourself! You are about to turn twenty-one, aren’t you? Still a scaredy cat? And what if he hears? What will he do? We do have a good excuse in our favour— rain. We will just say that we got stuck on the way. Besides, S.K.G has a lot on his platter aside from troubling us.’ Siddhartha folded his pants above his knee. 

Subhadip, an English major, crossed them and came to a sudden halt— ‘Don’t make the mistake of going to the College Street area today, S.K.G is heading in that direction. He just took a cab.’

‘College Street is a place for intellectuals like you. See if you can go and fuck some Milton in this rain.’

Subhadip stared at the sky with a stern face and said— ‘I will head home now.’

‘Oh, yes, it’s the pre-tests soon, that’s why these losers will get home and study. And we, the good boys, have completed the syllabus a year back, and are relaxing now.’

Turning his face away, Subhadip was about to mumble something, when losing his balance, he slipped and fell straight into that pool of water, resulting in squeals, shouts and swears. Sidhu moved ahead, kicking through the water with his boots. His stunt splattered water over a woman’s face. Protecting her face with her cloth, the woman grumbled to herself— ‘And they call themselves civil, model students at the college.’

And before Sunando, Siddhartha and Indranil could reach the main road, Kaushik from Chemistry told them on his way— ‘Wait, I will call your home.’  

‘Then your house will have a return call, and your father will get to listen to such obscenities that his ears will bleed.’

Reaching the bus stand, Sunando said, “Where shall we go?”

Indra looked at his watch, if they were to start at nine, they would reach home at ten, which meant they would have to be somewhere close to the metro station. 

‘The Lake then?’

‘They won’t let us sit there in the evening.’

‘Let’s head to Gaja Park then.’

‘We won’t be allowed to drink booze.’

‘We could go to Victoria Memorial.’

‘Do you stay outside Kolkata? Don’t you know the gates close in the evening?’

‘Well, none of these options are to your liking. Let’s go to a bar then.’

‘Don’t talk stupid. You want to go to a bar in these wet clothes? And how much money do we have to allow us to sit for that long? They will grab us by the collars and throw us out.’

Sidhu was quiet for a while. Getting up suddenly, he said, ‘Come, let’s go to Maidan.’

The other two stared at him, surprised. Sunando mumbled with a pale face, ‘Maidan again? Didn’t we decide not to—’

Indra looked steadily at Sidhu’s direction, ‘Do you want to prove yourself a hero?’

Siddhartha said softly, ‘What’s done is done. Why can’t you take the matter simply as an accident? Look, the three of us were intoxicated at that time. That’s why I am asking you to think of the entire incident as a mild error. And what do you fear so much? We should go there at the very least to get over this fear.’

Sunando licked his lips— ‘I still feel very guilty about what I did.’

‘Have you murdered someone? Robbed someone? It was perhaps an animal or a madman—’

‘I still wake up often from sleep at night in fear.’

‘Bullshit.’ Siddhartha started walking in the opposite direction.

‘Sidhu, listen.’ Indra pulled his hand. 

‘Are you leaving?’

‘What should I do, I can’t put up with cowards.’ Sidhu looked indifferently at the sky, ‘The sky is packed with clouds, I’d rather go home. And where are you two planning to go? Victoria, right? Yeah, you can go there.’

‘We’re cowards?’

‘You might not think of yourself as that.’

Indra thought of something while he bit his lips with his teeth, and then he said in a way as if he had the answer to all problems— ‘Alright then, Maidan.’

Sunando looked around with scared eyes, ‘I am scared.’

‘That is precisely why we are going. We must shake this fear off.’

‘Can’t we go somewhere else?’

‘No.’

‘It had rained just like this that day.’

‘If you have a problem, you can go home.’

Sunando sighed— ‘Have I ever left you two? I will come since you're insisting. But be prepared for the consequences as well.’

‘What are you going on about like a mad person? What do you mean by consequence? And then it will bother you if I laugh at your words. This is what happens when you watch those sad horror films. Sidhu, where do you plan to buy booze?’

‘There are plenty of shops in Park Street. We will also need a large bottle of Coke. How much money do the three of us have? Wouldn’t it suffice?’

By the time the three of them spread newspapers under that familiar tree in Maidan and sat, it was just six in the evening, yet it had turned quite dark because the sky was overcast. It was windy and there were drops of rain. To the right was a thicket with tall trees, the top of the Tata Centre was visible. The entire field was filled with water, submerged in a desolate, silent darkness as if it were an ancient slaughterhouse. 

Mixing vodka and coke in a bottle, Indra began shaking it, while Sidhu hummed a song. It was just Sunanda who was a little subdued. 

Indra handed Sunando the bottle— ‘Here, you start.’

About to pour the liquid down his throat, Sunando exclaimed, suddenly startled— ‘Cat!’

‘Huh?!’

‘A cat called—did you hear?’

Siddhartha guffawed and slapped Sunando’s back— ‘So you’re buzzed even before you’re drunk? Hearing cat calls, are we? So can’t you see this live cat chasing the mouse?’

Sunando bristled— ‘Don’t joke all the time. I have distinctly heard and that is final. What do you two think? That I am a scaredy cat? Don’t mind but I find this a little difficult to accept.’ 

‘Hey now! Why are you being so serious? I was just kidding and—’

‘Haven’t I told you already that jokes aren’t welcome all the time? Now if I call you insensitive, you will call it my fear. But please, for me the matter has not yet paled in significance.’

Indranil, who was listening to his friend speak with a suppressed smile, chimed in— ‘Ah Sidhu! You really shouldn’t have done that. You know how sensitive our Sona is, he’s a poet after all! Poets are a little like that! Tell me, haven’t you written poems on Arpita?’

Sunando looked startled, ‘How do you know?’

Smiling impishly, Indra said, ‘Let’s just suppose that you yourself have admitted.’

Siddhartha roared in laughter— ‘Sona you’re an absolute idiot! You believe everything he says? He was just taking a blind guess; can’t you understand?’

Indra chuckled, ‘Around two years back, on a similar rain-filled evening, I ran through the breadth of Maidan. I won’t be able to explain that feeling. The field seemed to be poised to swallow me like a ghoul, the angel atop the Victoria in the distance slowly fading away, I even slipped and fell once—my mud-covered body—the tall trees swayed as if they would fall anytime. I wondered at that point how great it would be if only I could write poetry.’

Sunando handed the bottle over to Indra, ‘Here, have some, you’ll spout poetry if you do.’

Siddhartha spoke— ‘Although not quite like yours, I have had an experience here as well. One evening, while I was returning home drunk, I suddenly decided to walk right through the middle of Maidan. It was quite nice, you know. Winter. A cool breeze was blowing. The only light atop the Tata Centre was visible at a distance. The field was swathed in a white foggy shawl. I moved diagonally towards Jeevan Deep, when suddenly I heard someone scream close to my ear, ‘Move away’. I was already a little absent-minded because I was tipsy, and I didn’t realize that someone was close to me. A little disconcerted, I looked around and saw a madman, without a shred of clothing on him, even in that cold December, a dirty rag at his waist. Staring at me, he shouted again, ‘Move away.’ I considered giving him some money, but before I could do that he glared and said— ‘Come here to have fun, have you? Now watch what real fun is.’ Saying that, he just threw away the rag at his waist. Just imagine the situation! I was alone in that dark field, a naked madman right in front of me, as if it were Lord Shiva himself. I stood there somewhat stunned, when all of a sudden, the madman bellowed, stretched out both his arms, and made for the thicket up close. As if melting into the air around. Wailing and running to the bushes, stretching both his arms—strange! I have come here many times since but never seen him.’

Pouring quite a lot of booze down his throat, Siddhartha turned to Sunando— ‘So Sona, how many times have we come to Maidan following that cat episode?’

‘Not once. Why?’

‘And why haven’t we? Fear?’

‘No, not that it’s not the thing Sidhu! I won’t be able to explain it fully. But it was raining just like this that day. The entire Maidan was submerged in water—knee-deep water. We were right here underneath this tall tree, perhaps the whole thing is my imagination, but I am not being to evade this feeling. Perhaps it is some superstition.’

Sidhu observed Sunando’s face— it looked pale. Sunando was licking his lips constantly. 

‘Are you scared right now?’

Sunando looked back absent-mindedly— ‘Fear? No, it’s not fear entirely. Honestly, I find myself guilty. We have done something violent, something we wouldn’t have done had we been in our senses. You know what the thing is? Let me tell you about something that happened ten years ago. I was in class six or seven then. A beggar used to come to our home every Sunday. I was the one to hand him the money every time. That day he was standing at the door and as I was about to give him the money, the coin fell from my hand. I picked it up and placed it in his hands. Bowing with his usual namaskar, he was about to leave, and I was going to close the door when I heard a terrible noise outside, followed by a huge hue and cry. I went outside immediately and saw that the beggar was run over by a lorry while he was crossing the road. Just think, if I hadn’t dropped the coin, he would have crossed the road much before. I wept a lot at that point, you know! I was young after all. I realized later that I didn’t have a hand in what happened. How could it have—'

Indra was quite drunk by then. He shouted, ‘Stop it, stop it! Don’t fight, calm down-calm! It is not a matter of sorrow—'

Sunando sighed.

And as the night progressed, the trio became more and more inebriated. Rolling his head on Indra’s lap at one point of time, Siddhartha said— ‘Someone joins Madhuri Dixit’s fan club, some other startles with a blade, some other fellow arrives at the fan club with a knife, someone threatens Madhuri, some—’

Indra drawled, ‘Sidhu baba, don’t drink anymore. We need to get back home.’

‘Home? Oh yes, home, need to get back home, my sweetest, loveliest home, Sona, how many steps is your home from the footpath?’

‘Huh?!’

‘Count it today. I keep telling you that it’s more than a hundred, but you keep saying no; now I will say it’s less than a hundred—you—’

Sunando nodded his head and rhymed softly—‘Anjana is on a riverbank in Khanjani village, Ranjana sings Ganjana on a riverbank, and Ganjana sings Sanjani on a riverbank—’

Indra groaned in a garbled voice— ‘Riya left me. I’ve spent so much on her— no, I really loved her. And that scoundrel engineer— I swear I’ll kill him, yes, I will kill him— fuck! Why do I always think of Riya when I am drunk?’

Sidhu mumbled a question with his eyes closed— ‘Did you sleep with Riya?’

Indra was startled even in his inebriated state, ‘Sleep? No, I haven’t done anything of that sort, but we did go around for some time, quite a lot actually, Nicco Park, Aqua—’

‘Has the engineer slept then?’

Clutching his hair, Indra yelled— ‘I know, I know, if I ever get him near me, I will chop off his head. Who am I? I am Indranil, do you understand? I get what I want. I can buy Riya if needed— do you know that? My father has a lot of black money, I’ll buy her, yes, I will, I—’

‘To be or not to be—who said this?’

‘I think it’s Shakespeare. Why?’

Sidhu yawned and said, ‘Nothing, just asked.’

‘Do you not believe that I can buy Riya? Alright, alright then, bet? A thousand rupees, no, no, let’s make it ten thousand, no better yet, if I win, Riya is mine. And if I lose, I’ll give her away to you, you can have fun with her.’

‘No.’

‘Why not? I object, I object. You will have to accept, I will give her to you, I swear! No, I won’t need money. No, fair play, you will have to take, please—fuck it! Why does Riya come whenever I drink?’

Sidhu sat leaning on the tree with his eyes closed and Indra placed both his hands on Sidhu’s face and said in a broken voice— ‘Sidhu you’re such a close friend, won’t you take her? I am giving you—no, I object.’

Sidhu spoke out, his eyes closed, as if in self-denial, ‘Fear, its fear, Sona, fear this whole bloody life. The day I came back with Dada’s body, the prospect of facing Boudi scared me more than anything else in life. And Boudi? That woman wore every item she had in her jewelry box, and smiling she told everyone—he has left enjoying this life, in utter enjoyment. I couldn’t face that woman; can a mad woman comprehend someone normal? And how she smiled looking at Dada’s dead body! That fear—it shrivels my chest just thinking about it—dhyat! I swear I don’t like this painful conversation anymore.’

Suddenly a nightbird cawed and ruffled its wings noisily somewhere above them. Sunando hugged Indra with the speed of lightning— ‘Cat!’

‘Cat? Whose cat? Hey cat, who do you belong to?’

‘Remember when we were drowning the cat, didn’t it give out this exact sound?’

Sidhu seemed to awaken from sleep— ‘Cat? Ah, that cat. It’s dead. Dead, good that it’s dead. How long has it been? About six months, isn’t it?’

Sunando mumbled with a dead face— ‘I’m really scared. This sound, exactly like that cat’s, exact—’

‘We killed it right here, didn’t we?’

‘The cat, the place, everything’s the same.’ Indra said— ‘You know what Sona, the cat looked like that haramzada engineer, exactly like—’

Sidhu spoke in a trance— ‘The eyes were glowing dimly, weren’t they? It had come right here; on this field—yes, it was probably crossing this field. I don’t know what had come over us, as if all the blood had rushed to our heads. How much did we drink that night? Four pegs? No, forty pegs? Huh, four hundred? Or was it more—’

Sunando swallowed and said, ‘We kept it soaked in the cold waters drenched by that winter rain’, Sunando shivered— ‘And a black substance oozed out of its nose and mouth at the very end, it stuck someplace near my right elbow, right here—’

Suddenly Sunando let out an inarticulate scream, his eyes seemed to bulge out of his ashen face. The other two watched in indescribable horror as a black liquid trailed down Sunando’s elbow.

The three of them were speechless for about a minute. Sunando looked as if he would faint. Indra was shivering, his throat parched. 

Sidhu was the first one to get a hold on himself. He usually thought clearly in trouble. He immediately yanked Sunando’s hand and looking at it, sighed, ‘Oh, how did you cut your hand? You tripped here on the field; was there a glass shard or something?’

 Following Sidhu, Indra had also managed to regain his composure— ‘Yeah, you often don’t feel it if you cut a wet hand.’ 

The three of them were out of their drunken stupor. Sunando peered at them as if he were possessed— ‘Glass? No, it’s not glass. Are you two mad? Wouldn’t I understand if I cut myself? This is—’

‘Sona you’re going mad, you hear me? Look, there’s a cut right below your elbow. You have cut your hand in glass. Sona, look at me, a dead thing cannot come alive, I’m telling you it can’t. Haven’t you cut your hand before?’

‘The blood hasn’t dried yet.’

‘You fell today.’

‘There was a stain of dark blood right here.’

‘There were plenty of glass shards on the field.’

‘I couldn’t sleep at night.’

‘And you cut your hand in one of those bits of glass.’

‘The cat is moving towards us.’

‘A dead thing cannot come alive. You have cut your hand on glass—’

‘There was blood everywhere in that field!’

Indra clutched Sunando’s throat with both his hands— ‘Say that you cut your hands on glass, say that you’re not scared. Say that there’s no blood, that there’s nothing. Otherwise, I’ll kill you! Say it, say—’

Not a squeak came out of Sunando’s throat. Sidhu stared at them like a moron. Eventually, with great effort, Sunando rasped— ‘Why did we kill the cat?’

Indranil let go of Sunando immediately. He mumbled in a low voice, his eyes burning— ‘Don’t you know why? Didn’t I tell you that the cat’s face resembled that fucking mongrel engineer? I am Indranil, I get whatever I want, whatever I want—Riya—don’t you know that? I would have ripped the cat’s neck apart! He is with Riya, Riya goes around with him, she sleeps with him! His face is blunt just like that cat’s, and apparently his feet don’t make noise when he walks. Son of a bitch! I have murdered the cat, good that I have. Now it’s the engineer’s turn. Whatever I want—good that I have done it. And if you fuckers feel so saintly, why did you kill it? Aren’t you ashamed saying all this now?’

Sidhu spoke gloomily— ‘Me as well—actually, I felt like doing something different, something uncommon. A few days before this incident there was a political murder in our locality. The face was smashed with a heavy rock—my insides were numb at the morbidity of the episode. I didn’t feel a thing on seeing blood for many days after that. I used to feel like shoving everything aside—one of my Dadas, he’s a student of literature, it was written in one of his books, ‘Demolish all institutions, point a canon at the headquarters of power.’ I had really taken to that statement although I didn’t understand a word. I used to think about striking someone, anyone at all. Life had become unbearable. Ma and Baba fighting every day at home, market in the mornings, cooking, screams, budgets and salaries, lists, newspapers, ufff….’ Sidhu sat with his head in both his hands, ‘I hate that life! And this murder took place in the midst of it all— it was the first time I had seen anything of that sort, it was something so out of the ordinary, something that instills fear in everyone. And that singularity pulled me, jolted my staid life, I was about to run away from it all—cat, yes, that cat—as if I poured all my escapism inside it—all my violence— my revenge—you know, my insides felt empty after killing that cat. As if someone whispered in my ears that all my running had finally come to an end. Get back to that life again, try to escape anew.’

Closing his eyes, Indra sat down breathlessly— ‘It stared at us with blazing eyes. Blood rushed to my head. I ran, caught hold of it firmly and sunk it in the water. It fought back— that’s when you two came.’

Staring like a moron, Sunando said, ‘Would you care to listen to my version? It was after I saw you two. When the two of you sunk that cat, your faces changed somehow, riddled with innumerable fault lines, sunken eyes like dark caves, blazing just like that cat’s was. Watching all this churned my insides, as if I was under a spell, drawn to that blood, I became frenzied. Looking at you two, I wondered if only the two of you would relish the taste of that blood. Wouldn’t I get any share? It couldn’t be. I wanted a share of that blood as well, I wanted to see that blood spill, smell that blood, smear my face with all that blood. And so, I went— why did I?’

The three of them sat down again, a little shaken. A gust of stormy wind rushed past them, escaping from between the dark trees above. A suffocating stillness filled the entire field. A black-coloured bird whistled and flew over their heads. Perhaps an owl.

A little later, Sunando spoke, ‘Indra, how did I cut my hand?’ 

‘I don’t know.’

‘Why don’t I feel pain?’

‘I don’t know.’

Sidhu spoke out, ‘Sona, wasn’t I the one to make you watch an adult film for the first time? Naked girls don’t scare you and the sight of blood does? Do you see yourself? Don’t you scare yourself?’

‘Stop it.’

Sidhu became quiet. There was only a little liquor left in the bottle. Picking it up with both hands, Sidhu gulped it all at once and then aimlessly threw the bottle at the field. There was a splash somewhere.

Indra said with closed eyes, ‘Sunando, I was more scared than you.’

‘I know.’

‘How did you know?’

‘When you clutched my throat, that’s when I knew.’

After some time, Indra spoke again, ‘I haven’t been able to sleep properly in the last two months. I have been frightened all the time. What’s all this fear? Just because I killed a cat? Fear at seeing my own shadow, fear at even my own surroundings. I don’t think I’d be able to escape this fear in this lifetime.’

A stormy wind wailed past them soaking them in its fervour. Sidhu spoke almost to himself— ‘We need to do something different— is this fear different?’

There was a sudden sound in that darkness. A very familiar sound. Everyone shivered.

Sidhu said— ‘It’s a bird.’

Indra said— ‘Bird.’

Meanwhile Sona stared. 

A leaf dropped off from the tree and fell near Indra’s feet. Indra became inert. Meanwhile the wind gushed noisily. 

‘Sidhu?’

‘Hmmm?’

‘Why do we scare so easily? All our lives?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘Why can’t I forcefully say that it’s good I killed it?’

‘Fear.’

‘Fear of what?’

‘Of some unfamiliar entity.’

Sunando suddenly started trembling. ‘Do you remember at what time we killed the cat that day?’

‘Yes, I remember, I had looked at the watch. It was seven minutes past nine.’

‘What time is it now?’

Indra brought his watch close to his eyes and then stopped.

‘Five minutes past nine.’

‘Indra, the cat is coming.’

 ‘What do you mean?’

‘I can hear it. The sound was definitely the cat’s. Listen to it carefully.’

Sidhu wheezed, ‘Don’t speak nonsense.’

Indra clutched Sidhu’s hands, his hands as cold as ice. 

The wind lashed again. The dark, water-filled field stood like a slaughterhouse. One or two leaves dropped from the trees. 

‘The cat will come at seven minutes past nine.’

‘No.’

‘Black substance on its nose and mouth—’

‘No.’

Indra let out a suppressed shriek. 

Sunando hugged Indra. He said with a bloodless face— ‘Listen.’

Yes, this time all three of them could hear it clearly. There was no room for error. It was the call of a cat— calling them exactly like a human. But unnaturally. It was a gurgling sound, like that of a drowning cat. They couldn’t see anything in the darkness. But there was no mistaking that sound.

Ice rolled down the spine of those three, left speechless, spell-bound by a paralyzing terror.   

And nearby they heard the water splash.

The hissing winds brought the stale smell of blood. 

Two leaves fell from the tree into the still water.

Time lay in wait.